Adam's Beanstalk

A daily adventure-bag of insights and old bones from an unknown poet in Manitoba's south. Caveat: Not everything is to be taken literally. Things are often shaded with poetic crayons; be the owl. Also, not all these bones are collected from different fields. Find themes that run througout each post and the journal as a whole; the most insignificant event may be part of an ear.

Monday, April 23, 2007

'Git Along Little Doggy

So more on the puppy story...

Dad always said puppy was a Holdeman because of his little beard, but a phonecall we got late one night proved that this joke was indeed true...

[7:00 PM, April xx, Three days after the dog ran away from our place]
RING, RING!! RING, RI..
"Hello" I say.
"Hello," says phone back, "My name is Kendall Goossen".
"That's an interesting name for a phone" I say.
"I'm not a phone, I'm a person" it says.
"Oh," says me.
"Hey, did you guys see a white dog at your place?"
"Yes," I say, "We grew quite attached to it".
"Well, it was our dog! One day he and our cat ran away together. I guess it was spring and they were going after the same thing. It was raining out, and they were gone for two weeks. I thought they were dead. But then two days ago, the dog gets back here, and there is this phone number written on the collar" says Kendall.
"A phone number?" I ask.
"Yes, your number" he says.
"This is a good story," I say, "I am going to put it on my blog. May I ask what the dog is named?".
"The dog is named Socks" he says.
I laugh, because this is a particularly bad name.
"And the cat is named Strawberry" he says.
This name is even worse. The cat, if you recall, is light beige.
"Is he still at your place?" asks Kendall.
"Yes," I say, "and in a couple of months there will be twenty more Strawberries".
"Well," says he, "I better pick up Strawberry #1. The kids miss him".
"Come whenever you want" I say.

And so he comes, and Strawberry is gone. The kids laugh in the truck. Now both the animals are returned to their rightful owner.

Next morning, a white streak dashes across the lawn.
It's Socks.

Over the next week, Socks is picked up twice. He has always returned.
Why? He is not a Holdeman. He likes to sleep in the shed listening to Clear FM. He likes to lie on the couch and watch Animal Planet on TV. He has been a very bad little puppy. If only Kendall knew.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

A few things that are both a)recent and b)interesting:

DOG UPDATE
Corrections: The dog no longer likes meatloaf. The dog changes his food choice every day. He won't eat anything other than his select meal. He sometimes stands on his hind legs to eat food, like Chinstrap used to do (Although he doesn't jump and do backflips). The dog also likes to run away. Often he leaves for a day, or even two, and then mom gets really sad because she thinks the dog is gone forever, and then the dog comes back. This has happened more than once. And the dog always returns with pine needles.
The cat stays behind. They seem to have had a falling out. This might be because we make dog come in the house, when he often doesn't want to, and we make cat stay outside, though he would LOVE to come in. Nevertheless, Shane still refers to the pair as "Team Guido".

PLAYING A SHOW FOR THE TRACTOR CLUB.
On March 31st, Jason K., T.J. Siemens, and I played a show for an annual banquet of Tractor loving people. Yes! These are the same people that bring us the annual Riverside Tractor Show, which has been featured in many poems of Mr. Chase Yellowquill, who also happens to be a perennial favorite to win the lawnmower race. So, we put together a good set which included "I Walk the Line", and "Man of Constant Sorrow" to please both young and old (the audience was largely composed of the latter). The band's favorite song was "John Saw that Number" by Neko Case, which I urge you to download illegally. After we went to Harold and Margaret's to watch footage of the show. It was there that I also saw my first hot-crossed bun, which I forgot to take home to eat.

THE COUPLES CONNECTION
So we through a shower for cousin Kody and his fiancee Amy last Friday. It was the first time I had met her; she being from England and meeting Kody in Palestine. So at this party Shane and Mom and I came up with a little game based on "The Newlywed Game", called "The Couples Connection". 6 of our family couples competed for the title to become the Ultimate Couple. Some questions asked were:
Which amusement park ride would you say your relationship with your partner most closely resembles?
a)The bumper cars, b)Roller Coaster, c)Teacups, d)The Drop of Doom.
And yes, the Drop of Doom was chosen.
More fun occurred when Uncle G said his wife most closely resembled a bear (above all other zoo animals), and Grandma claimed she was "A Tiger".
Also, when asked "which article of clothing does your significant other wear too often?", there were more than a few undergarments mentioned in addition to the standard responses.
All chaos broke loose during the bonus round, when the question "Name Your Partner's most attractive physical feature" was asked. Needless to say, the answers were a little unexpected for a family gathering. Even more shocking was the fact that several partners matched their wife's response.

EASTER SUNDAY
Was significant and memorable. Beautiful weather, and a few of us left the family gathering to go to the treehouse. At the bottom, the refrozen river was feet away from the base of the tree. Rings of ice from previous melting clung to the trees like a frilly dress. At the top, one could see for miles through the unbudded trees. Children played by the road that leads to the submerged bridge in the distance. There was laughing, the joy of Easter Sunday. But they also threw sticks onto the ice.